Mummy dictionary

Sweater

(Pronunciation) ‘swe-tah’

noun

noun: sweater; plural noun: sweaters

:a knitted garment typically with long sleeves, worn over the upper body when your mother is cold; but you’ve been playing so you actually don’t need to wear it.

It’s so ridiculously funny how I have all these things that I do and then come to the realization that I have become my mother:

1. I lick my finger and remove gunk from Kendi’s eyes. I used to scream ‘eeeewwww’ when my mother did that. Now, when Kendi struggles to get away from my wet finger, I think to myself ,’how does she expect to get clean, this insolent child?’ I laugh at myself.

2. I ask her, ‘where are you from? whose child are you?’ This person is not even 1 year old and I’m already wondering whose child she is? Why am I my mother?

3. I talk about myself in the third person. ‘Ang’o ma omiyo inang’o mama?’ (why are you licking mama?’) I read somewhere that you know you are a parent, when you start talking about yourself in the third person. Hilarious. And I remember my mother doing this.

4. Eating the rest of Kendi’s food. This is the most disgusting thing I can think of to do. I don’t understand why I do it. I just don’t like to waste food. Or maybe that’s what I tell myself so as to feel better. This, my mother never did actually. Only daddy was available to eat our food when we got too full.

5. Inspecting poop like a scientist. I used to laugh till I cry when I see parents do this. What are you looking for? What is the purpose of that activity? are questions that I’d ask.

Now look at me. Now surely look at me.

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